Reality Resolute and Everything Now

2012.

Reality check. Creative-check, I’d say.

Indeed a cliché, I look upon the new year with hopes to do better things. That’s all there is, kan? To be the better person, be a better Muslim, spend more good quality family time, eat more healthily, run longer, lose more weight, wardrobe makeover, learn more, swim more, cycle longer, get new shoes, watch plays, collect the stamps, learn to play drums, help the needy, participate in social services, donate blood, pass exams, grow organic plants, get a cat, and more.

It’s always about more, bigger, better. Subhanallah, what have I become?

It’s only January, but we have all year mapped out. But I look up high for uncertainties and spontaneous adventures to keep me going. But some realities are certain, and already taking the front seats.

Reality 1 – Batman Jr. is coming. Last time, before Aiden arrives, we managed a traffic free bedroom when Iris moved into her own room at 3. Now, with Aiden still with us, Batman Jr. will add more orchestra to our room. The playpen, swing, and arrays of plush toys, not forgetting the diapers, ointments, extra towels and the whole fiasco will take permanent residence in our room for another 3 years. I cannot discount when there are many trying times when Iris would insist to bunk with us (she’s a tad jealous).

It is just a matter of days before we’d hurry to the hospital, and bunk at the hospital’s sofa bed. And I am thankful our earlier decisions to buy baby stuff in neutral colours are adaptable to Batman Jr. Had they all be in their pinks, we’d have to round another shopping spree.

Reality 2 – Iris started her first day in the mainstream school, and I spent the whole week ferrying her around between morning and evening school. She took it like a real sport – smiling and not worrying a thing. That’s what being at playschool since 4 would do. I can never get instrumental enough for her. I missed her when she’s at school, and we’d secretly stopped for ice-cream, just the 2 of us, when I picked her up from school as she’d go on about her new friends, school, etc.

It simply means fitting her schedule against ours. Homeworks, tuitions, swim class, diet, orderly sleeping time, campaign to run for presidency, world domination.

Reality 3 – I failed one paper in my professional exams. I know I have never been the studious type in the family, and my state of dyslexity makes it more difficult to understand the stuff I was reading. And this year I have to have a go at it again, burying myself in the codes of conducts, Acts, legislations. To be honest, I do not surely know what to do with it yet, had I pass the papers. However, again, I hope, things will fall into places and I’d be able to chart a better quality life.

Let’s see if I am cut out to be one, once and for all. If not, perhaps I should join Masterchef Malaysia Season 2 and cook varieties of Maggi Mee.

And 2011 was not mostly kind. I drifted a lot, not knowing where I was heading. After a purposeful 2010, I spent half the time in 2011 worrying about trivial things. I forgot to keep the little things that matters. Honestly, I forgot most things I did last year. The most memorable events are when we found out about Batman Jr., and how I suffered in TNF100 and SCKLM, our family (shopping) trip, and Amy Winehouse’s passing. I think I have been overly complacent.    

And it is 2012. The year the Mayans predicted the end of the world. On the very day before my 38^th birthday. Or so they predicted.

Looking back to a mediocre 2011, I have better hopes for this year. As much as I aspired to become a philanthropist, or a successful Chef, but for the purpose more fitting for the contents of this blog and its kind readers; my head revolves around how to enjoy my 7^th marathon. Singular because, I have only 1 planned for 2012. It is more that a mouthful. To break the 4:45 comfortably, and injury-free. Perhaps by June, my shining Newton will be worn and seasoned for the adventure across KL City. But so far, every dates I have with her gives me a specific blister on my right toes. Love hurts, eh.

But in all honesty, I will have to be more creative to find ways (and time) to enjoy some alone time. Although most ideals always dwells down the idea of having a maid around, I’d have to be more resourceful. The immediate target is morning runs, which conveniently slots between dropping the girls off, and work that I have a sweet 75minutes alone. And although after-works are still favourable due to its crowd and chick factor – soon wifey would insist an earlier curfew in view of Batman Jr.’s feeding time. The only good thing is she’d be in a 3-months leave! Hopefully that should be good enough for my 18-months training for SCKLM.

But what’s beyond that will sap away my creative juice. If any of you who are in the same situation as me, please share your wisdom.

In terms of personal achievements, I see no shame in trying to go longer, faster, etc when it’s in my (and our) nature to see progress. Only last weekend during the FTAAA X-Country at Padang Merbuk, I sniffed the air for the excitement of small races, and the small hidden trails on the tray sparked the excitement of Genting Trailblazer. Small, short 10K races were the ones I started with, and perhaps it’s the way it should be for this year.

With 2011’s addiction to Cheezels and banana cakes, I hope that is a phase I could press on ahead without. It will be interesting to see how the mediocre cooking expertise to match the Australia’s Junior Masterchef’s offerings when I whip everyday food for Iris’s breakfasts, morning snacks, and afternoon snacks… as well as all of mine.

Happy New You, everyone.